PEBL President's Statement

Hi! I am your current Extreme Bocce deity. That's right - this is as good as it gets folks. I am the face of Extreme Bocce, the unquestioned despot and fearless leader of the PEBL. I would fill this space with pleas for your votes, with examples of my illustrious track record leading the PEBL to unprecedented growth, with tales of the old days when Extreme Bocce ran a yearly deficit and seemed on the verge of collapse, and with self serving half-truths designed to fog the mind and obscure reality - but thankfully, I have a lifetime appointment and you don't get to vote. So there.

Instead I will use this space to extol the virtues of Extreme Bocce and of the PEBL specifically. Extreme Bocce is about exploring the fundamental connection between mankind, terrain, manmade and natural structures, and four 109mm high-impact resistant resin balls. This is a connection that runs back to the earliest history of life on this planet. What we are talking about is not only the greatest game ever known to mankind, but one of the only games ever known to mankind that encourages players to hold their drinks while they play. Nuff said.

Now a bit about PEBL, the Extreme Bocce league brought to you by a gigantic consortium of venture capitalists, investment firms, and agribusinesses. The PEBL was organized to bring Extreme Bocce to the masses, the theory being that the increased time in parks combined with aerobic activity, hand-eye coordination development, and light strength conditioning will produce a physically superior workforce for the factories of post-apocalyptic America (which is coming quickly - see current events).

By beginning training now, the next several generations will be raised with the game and develop into larger, stronger, and more agile workforce to keep America competitive in the future. So the real questions are these: Do you love your children? and Do you love America?

If the answer to both is yes, the PEBL welcomes you with open arms and encourages you to become involved in organizing a chapter in your community. Remember, those with a leadership role will receive preferred status when the PEBL Worker Breeding Program® goes into effect after the third quarter of 2017. The PEBL is organized by cities, so there may already be a group near you! Please see our list of local chapters for more information.

Welcome Brothers and Sisters and remember - I'm not just the PEBL president, I'm also a member.